1. Whose cruel idea was it for the
word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
2. How come abbreviated is such a long word?
3. Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Orientals throw hamburgers?
4. Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?
5. Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?
6. Why does sour cream have an expiration date?
7. The light went out, but where to?
8. If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?
9. Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
10. When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!
11. Why are there 5 syllables in
the word "monosyllabic"?
12. Why do they call it the department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
13. Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?
14. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
15. When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?
16. Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not adoor?
17. Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
18. How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
19. If "con" is the opposite of "pro," then what is the opposite of progress?
20. Why is lemon juice mostly artificial ingredients but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?
21. Why buy a product that it
takes 2000 flushes to get rid of it?
22. Why do we wait until a pig is dead to "cure" it?
23. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
24. Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?
25. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
26. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
27. Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent?
28. Do married people live longer than single people or does it just SEEM longer?
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